Yesterday was my 36th birthday and I’m not entirely sure how I feel.
No, I’m not overly obsessed with aging, crow’s feet or cellulite. I mean it’s hard to find the time to care all that much. I think for me vanity is waning as I get older. I still have it, but maybe not to the degree that I used to. But maybe that’s a lie. Especially on a bad clothes/skin/hair day…… Those can sort of ruin me.
I’m more interested in where my heart and mind are. How much I’m reading, knitting and now, sewing. I’m thinking about what kind of kids I’m raising and if they know God. I’m worrying about the scary things of this world and wishing that the bad stuff never happened. I find myself feeling closer to my husband, because he “gets” me. I’m constantly trying to be more present with less technology. I cry about anything, but mostly in private. Seeming brave and strong are important to me as I am an example. I miss home and my family all the time; that just never gets any easier. I want my life to matter.
At 36 I feel a glimmer of contentment. I’m reading, writing, and focusing on gratitude a lot and it helps me see how blessed I am. I’m so very thankful on this day for my faith, my family, my friendships, my health, my ability to see, think, talk and feel.
*Yesterday I wanted to capture most of my day. The following are pictures from the day (However of course I forgot to get a pic of Gabe and I at dinner)*
|Grace and I just woke up.|
|All my birthday cards from my morning|
|Taking my man to Little Gym|
|Facetiming with Lizzy|
|Finished sewing my drawstring bag|