Saturday, September 6, 2008

35 hours and counting

Here's the truth, I'm still pregnant (I know that was the title of my last post :) and this morning I'm okay with that. Sounds strange? I know, I know. But I've been doing some reflecting this morning and here's what I've been thinking. When you find out you're pregnant, you anticipate this certain date for 10 months or so, just waiting for it to arrive. And then, like myself and many other moms-to-be, that date comes and goes and your uterus is still blocking your view of your newly painted toes. (Didn't mean to rhyme there) So, you have to just wait. You have to realize and then accept (that being the harder of the two) that you have NO control over when this baby will be born or even how this baby will be born. You may picture it one way and then something totally different becomes the reality. See, I'm getting a little nervous about going to the hospital on Monday because I don't really know what to expect. I mean, in general, I have an idea of what's going to happen, but I don't know know. So, I'm getting scared but at the same time excited. Excited to see this little girl who I've known about since December, but haven't known. I'm nervous to become a mom of 2 and all that it entails. I'm ready, but I'm not ready-and I'm sure that many women have felt this exact same way. Tonight is Saturday and tomorrow I plan to go to church and then take it easy and really pay attention. It's going to be Maddie's last day as an only child (something she'll probably never remember) and it feels bittersweet. The countdown has now officially begun; in about 35 hours I'll be admitted to the hospital and ready to meet my baby Grace.

6 comments:

Janie said...

Hi Sarah,

You are in my thoughts and prayers everyday! I know everything will go great on Monday. I can't wait to see the first pictures of the baby!!
I'm coming home for the girls dedication ceremony in October. I can't wait to see everyone. I miss everyone back home so much!!! Give my love to Maddie and Gabe.
Love,
Janie

Laura said...

Monday! That's exciting! We have our first Ultra Sound on Monday! I can't wait to see our little fetus... I'm estimated between 9 and 10 weeks, and I hope to get a new date with the US, I want to have the baby in March (instead of April).

And I'm already done being pregnant (I'll trade with you!) ;)
Baby has made me sick for the last 2 weeks, and FINALLY tonight I was able to actually eat something (a burger) and keep from being sick. YAY! Although it makes me worry about how I'll feel tomorrow, since everyday is different. Jason just told me that he thinks the worst is over because he senses a different energy from me tonight! Lets cross our fingers. :)

I hope all goes well with you and little Grace! I'll be thinking about you all. :)

Love, Laura

Siobhan said...

Everything you said is so true and it's an incredible time. I really feel for you as the waiting time is the hardest and strangest and most reflective time because that's all you really can do...wait and think about everything. How things are, how things will be and how will all members of the family will change a little accordingly and be affectioned individually by the arrival!
I empathise also about the heart tugging thoughts that are probably occurring when you think about Maddie and how her world is going to change. I really felt that about Aibha, but the reality is that you're giving her a wonderful gift, one that she will be forever grateful for (even though she may not always believe that ;) )-a litle sister who will love and adore her for the rest of her life. In Aibha's case her number 1 Princess fan :)
Looking back on it now, I am thankful Aisling took things into her own hands to come that little bit early and end the wait. :) Aibha is missing Maddie and yourself greatly...as she puts it her bestest cousins haven't been to visit for a while. When questioned further as to who her bestest cousins were?...Maddie and Sarah of course. Duh Mommy!!! Looking forward to meeting baby Grace.
We're off to Sunday School (first day for Aibha so all excited!)
Big hugs and sloppy kisses, the Jennings Girls :)

Siobhan said...

Wow should have spell-checked before posting that-sorry :)You get the gist! xx

Claudia said...

Dear Sweet Sarah,
You have been on my heart every minute these past few days. Your dad told me the plans for tomorrow as soon as he picked me up at the airport tonight. I'll be praying for all the details. I know you know this, but just remember what a gift from God your children are; and I know they will grow to know how blessed they are to have you and Gabe as parents. I love you.
Clod

SARAH said...

Thank you to all who wrote to me. I'm getting ready to leave for the hospital but wanted to say thank you and I, too, can't wait to see her. Love to you all.