Saturday, September 6, 2008
35 hours and counting
Here's the truth, I'm still pregnant (I know that was the title of my last post :) and this morning I'm okay with that. Sounds strange? I know, I know. But I've been doing some reflecting this morning and here's what I've been thinking. When you find out you're pregnant, you anticipate this certain date for 10 months or so, just waiting for it to arrive. And then, like myself and many other moms-to-be, that date comes and goes and your uterus is still blocking your view of your newly painted toes. (Didn't mean to rhyme there) So, you have to just wait. You have to realize and then accept (that being the harder of the two) that you have NO control over when this baby will be born or even how this baby will be born. You may picture it one way and then something totally different becomes the reality. See, I'm getting a little nervous about going to the hospital on Monday because I don't really know what to expect. I mean, in general, I have an idea of what's going to happen, but I don't know know. So, I'm getting scared but at the same time excited. Excited to see this little girl who I've known about since December, but haven't known. I'm nervous to become a mom of 2 and all that it entails. I'm ready, but I'm not ready-and I'm sure that many women have felt this exact same way. Tonight is Saturday and tomorrow I plan to go to church and then take it easy and really pay attention. It's going to be Maddie's last day as an only child (something she'll probably never remember) and it feels bittersweet. The countdown has now officially begun; in about 35 hours I'll be admitted to the hospital and ready to meet my baby Grace.