Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Day 143

My Mom came to visit and because of how much fun I have when she's here, the blog got neglected. Last night Gabe and I went to our Pastor and his wife's wedding renewal/anniversary event and it was terrific. On the way home, an idea struck me. I turned to Gabe and asked if he thought he could take the day off tomorrow (which is now today) and he thought about it. Turns out he can (he went in to get some things done first) and we are off to Baltimore's Aquarium with the girls. Yay!! :)

We've been having a rough few weeks with the girls and since I'm human, it's really starting to get to me. I couldn't fathom another day of summer doing the same things ( even Target has gotten old). It's so hot here, we're cooped up, and to be honest, I'm counting down the days until school starts! 3 weeks ago I was crying that they were all leaving me and now I'm singing a different tune :) They need school and I need some peace and quiet. I've decided (right this very minute) that I DO NOT feel guilty about admitting that. I'm surrounded by Mom's who never take a break from their children. And, I've come to realize that that's fine...it's their way of parenting. But, for me, I need some time without them. I need to just be me; a person who is a Mom by vocation but one who isn't completely defined by that choice.

I've had this restlessness lately. I'm not clear on what it's about. It usually rears itself as a HUGE desire to move away...you know, closer to that other ocean. But, I know I'm called to be content whatever the circumstances and that's a real trial for me. I'm a work in progress and today that's enough.

2 comments:

Dan said...

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having your own time. I tell Jen all of the time we all need some time by ourselves (or minus kids). For me, golf is my out, for her it's the gym, or fun with some friends. It keeps everyone sane.

As long as the girls know you love them (which they undoubtedly do), the few hours a week you get by yourself will obviously have no ill affect on your ability to parent. Love you!

Anonymous said...

Hope you have an awesome day!
-Elisabeth